Queer & A: Kristen Bell, Being Queer enough, Dinosaurs & Pride Month

In this episode, we answer questions posed by users on Reddit and also our recent experience of adopting a new dog. We address the hate received by Kristen Bell for showing her pride on Instagram and the regressive comments that followed. We tackle the misconceptions surrounding the LGBTQ+ community and challenge the idea that being Queer goes against nature. 

We also explore the struggles of feeling "Queer enough" and how Queer spaces can bring a sense of belonging and acceptance. We even share our obsession with dinosaurs and the importance of celebrating events like Pride month. 

So, don't miss out on this jam-packed and perfectly queer episode. Tune in now and be part of the conversation. Share, like, and subscribe to Let's Be Perfectly Queer on your favorite podcast platform. Until next time, stay perfectly queer!

Topics discussed:

- Katie's battle with Covid

- Adopting a new dog

- Hate comments received by Kristen Bell

- Feeling "Queer enough" in a hetero relationship

- The importance of community and support

- Love for dinosaurs and planets

Entities mentioned:

- Kristen Bell

- Dorian Grey

The Loved One

'How far would you go to find the person who means the most to you in all the...

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Transcript

Podcast: Let's Be Perfectly Queer

Episode Title: Queer & A

Host(s): Katie, Archie


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Archie (Host) | 00:00:00 to 00:00:10
Welcome to let's be perfectly queer, a. Queer podcast, creating space to talk about all things queer. My name is Archie. And I'm Katie. And we are your hosts.

Katie (Host) | 00:00:10 to 00:00:21
And we're back again for another week. Yes. And Katie has new headphones, so she can actually hear herself. I can. It's all about levelling up in the podcasting world, one set at a time.

Archie (Host) | 00:00:21 to 00:00:28
Yeah. And now I can actually hear how. I sound, which is really nice. I don't know if it is. It's gonna be really nice when I edit.

Archie (Host) | 00:00:28 to 00:00:36
So then you're gonna be at the same level. I'm not constantly putting you up and down and jiggling all around. Little bit of hokey pokey here and there. Exactly. Exactly.

Archie (Host) | 00:00:36 to 00:00:38
So what have we been up to?

Katie (Host) | 00:00:40 to 00:00:49
Sick. I feel like it's the year of sickness. It's not the year of sickness. It's just the sickness of. It's this time of the year of sickness.

Archie (Host) | 00:00:49 to 00:00:54
Do you want to say that again? No, I don't. Okay. I want everyone to hear my ramblings. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:00:54 to 00:00:59
So Katie is getting over Covid. That is day eight. Seven. Seven. Today.

Katie (Host) | 00:00:59 to 00:01:12
Yeah. As you can tell by my beautiful voice, I actually. It was quite funny, and you guys missed it. And we didn't record for this, but there was a time where I sounded like a pre pubescent boy, where it was, like, a little bit high pitched, and then I'd go squeaky. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:01:12 to 00:01:20
It was like every fourth word. You were like, you're breaking. Your voice is breaking. Exactly like that. Exactly like that.

Katie (Host) | 00:01:20 to 00:01:29
Ah, you missed it. Hey, what you been up to? Well, work pretty much is work. I don't think we've been up to too much other than that. We went to a terrible glee party.

Katie (Host) | 00:01:30 to 00:01:37
We did? Yeah. We had friends who had their babies, which is really exciting. We adopted another dog.

Archie (Host) | 00:01:39 to 00:01:51
Oh, yeah. We adopted another dog. So for those of you don't know, the main dog refuge here in Perth is the dog refuge. Shenton park dog refuge. And we were looking at a different dog there.

Archie (Host) | 00:01:51 to 00:02:02
So we're looking at Marley and Katie had applied, and we've been applying for what? Or you've been applying for a good seven months, right? Yeah, I have been. I've been out there contacting every man and his dog. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:02:02 to 00:02:15
So funny. So we've applied. Katie's applied for a lot on our behalf, and we applied for Marley, and then we went to go visit Marley. And unfortunately, Marley was dog reactive. Very cute, but dog reactive.

Archie (Host) | 00:02:15 to 00:02:37
And we kind of just said, okay, maybe let's just stop it for a while. It's not going to happen. On Wednesday, I get a message from Katie, like, what do you think of these dogs? And she sent me two pictures, and I thought, I like the tan one. And at that time, Katie didn't know which one that she was gonna go look at because she basically got a call and said, hey, do you want to come to a dog meet with a completely different dog?

Archie (Host) | 00:02:37 to 00:02:47
And I got a message and Katie said, meet me at dog refuge after work. And, yeah, we have a dog. I love it how you just like, I got a message. You got. So I got.

Katie (Host) | 00:02:47 to 00:02:55
Spammed my messages. I was in my photography, my year nine photography class, just getting constantly spammed. Did you tell the kids? No. Oh, they had no idea.

Katie (Host) | 00:02:55 to 00:03:03
Did any of the kids know that you've got another dog? Yeah. Have you been showing all the pictures? No, some of them follow me on Instagram. That is so weird.

Katie (Host) | 00:03:03 to 00:03:15
Do they ever actually be like, oh, I saw what you did on the weekend. And you're like, ew. No, that's good. No, the rules are, if they are to follow me, that otherwise they get blocked immediately. They can't like anything.

Archie (Host) | 00:03:15 to 00:03:24
They can't comment on anything. They can't message me, and they can't say, talk about stuff that happens on my instagram. Oh, yeah. Otherwise they get automatically blocked and people have been blocked. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:03:24 to 00:03:34
Yeah. How did you figure that out? Like, how did you figure out those rules? I was just like, okay, look, I do have a public profile, and so you're gonna find me, but these are my rules. Otherwise I'll block you.

Katie (Host) | 00:03:34 to 00:03:50
Yeah, I guess you've been on social media for a very long period of time and had, like, quite a big presence, whether that be, like, starting on Tumblr. You were a MySpace kid, weren't you? I was a MySpace kid for sure. I've seen. I've seen your Ellie Facebook, of course.

Archie (Host) | 00:03:50 to 00:04:02
I used to do a lot of the, you know, we had a top eight. I used to do all the HTML code and then I could crack it and make it into like a top 32 and a top 64. It was really good. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, you're one of those kids.

Archie (Host) | 00:04:02 to 00:04:09
I was one of those kids that. You looked at the. I remember looking at the MySpace of some people and being like, how did they get a background? Like, how did this happen? I had background.

Archie (Host) | 00:04:09 to 00:04:16
I had music. I had a top 64 at one point. Of course you were. Of course you were. Oh, that's so entertaining.

Katie (Host) | 00:04:16 to 00:04:22
Anyway, back onto it. So we've got another dog. He's five months old. He is Jack Ross. Six months now.

Katie (Host) | 00:04:22 to 00:04:33
He's now six months old. He's a Jack Russell cross Mastiff, which. Yeah, I think you'd be imagining. You could not even imagine what he looks like. Cause he just looks.

Archie (Host) | 00:04:33 to 00:04:41
He's got the stumpy legs. He almost looks like he's got Park Corgi in him as well. Yeah. He's short, he's tan. He only has two modes.

Katie (Host) | 00:04:41 to 00:04:55
He's got menace mode or sleepy cuddly docky. And we're getting through to the puppy training at the moment because he pees on everything that represents a puppy pad. Yes. Which is not great. And so he's peed on many, many of the dog beds.

Katie (Host) | 00:04:55 to 00:05:01
And we have many, many dog beds. And so we've been doing a lot of washing. A lot. Yeah. And a lot of waking up.

Katie (Host) | 00:05:01 to 00:05:17
And I can't say, like, I really appreciate people who are new parents. I get it. I love hands out to our. Our beautiful people, but, oh, gosh, being a new parent to any animal is always difficult. It's a period of adjustment.

Katie (Host) | 00:05:18 to 00:05:27
And our other dog, Odie, if you're wondering how she's going, she's going really well now. Yeah. At the start, she was kind of like, why did you bring this person home? I thought this was. Well, person.

Archie (Host) | 00:05:27 to 00:05:35
Why'd you bring this dog home? Because I thought we were just having a playdate. And why is he still here? And then she'd wake up and she's like, grr. He's still here.

Archie (Host) | 00:05:35 to 00:05:39
But she loves him now. She does love him now. He's very cute. It's adorable. So that's our lives.

Archie (Host) | 00:05:40 to 00:05:49
Yeah. So this week, because we haven't had much time. No. And I mean, really all of our time presently is either working or supervised or me being sick. Yep.

Katie (Host) | 00:05:49 to 00:06:06
So we are doing another queer, backed by popular demand by us. We still want to get episodes out to you. And this was our way to still get episodes out to you without doing a lot of research. We do have two massive episodes coming up, which requires a lot of research and mental draining. They're very mentally draining.

Katie (Host) | 00:06:06 to 00:06:21
Yeah. And so, yeah, because I've got all the information about trans in sports, so that is calming. I've just got to put it into a way that I can present it to you without being 3 hours long. So it's very, very. And it's such an in depth topic.

Archie (Host) | 00:06:21 to 00:06:32
And I think it's probably going to come out hopefully just before the Olympics. So perfect timing. Perfect timing. Because it'll be a lot of people be talking about it and there'll be a lot of misinformation. So if you see that, send them our way.

Katie (Host) | 00:06:32 to 00:06:55
And if you didn't listen to our last episode, our last episode, you did with a lovely person, Bijan, about the world of comic books. I'm really looking forward to the interviews that we've got coming up. Yeah. In the future. So if you're looking at us for the next six months, we're looking at doing an interview with a dietitian who is part of the queer community.

Katie (Host) | 00:06:55 to 00:07:06
And we're going to have a chat about diet culture in the queer community. And then you're going to have a. Lovely chat to the queer history of Barbie. Absolutely. Which would be really, really cool.

Archie (Host) | 00:07:06 to 00:07:16
So I need to actually reply back to them on Instagram and line that up for you. I'm really excited to do that one as well. I think that will be great. I love it. And for preparation, I'm going to watch Barbie again.

Katie (Host) | 00:07:17 to 00:07:38
Like, I needed a reason. No, you don't need a reason to watch Barbie again. Yeah, true. Before we get into this episode, I don't have news, but I was on Instagram today doing my usual thing in the mornings, and I was scrolling on Instagram, getting ready for work. And the amount of hate that Kristen Bell has received for putting up a pride thing is disgusting.

Katie (Host) | 00:07:38 to 00:07:51
Okay. I'm not sure if you've seen it. So there's an awesome queer artist, and I think they're called Queer Chameleon or something like that. And they do these little, like, shorts, these little videos, and it's got two chameleons and little, like, memes. I love that.

Katie (Host) | 00:07:51 to 00:07:55
Yeah, they're beautiful. And I love them. Yeah. Yeah. So she shared one of their videos.

Archie (Host) | 00:07:55 to 00:08:11
Okay. And the amount of hate that it has got because she did, like, happy pride month. And I'm going to read a couple of the comments to you and see how you react and what your thoughts are. And. Cause when I was getting ready for work this morning, I was like, it feels like we're going backwards.

Archie (Host) | 00:08:11 to 00:08:29
And I've said, this sounds like we've said a lot. Like the world is more accepting, but with things like social media, people are able to hide behind screens and be as hateful as they want, and it's not great. And if you go to her Instagram right now, you can probably see the. The video and. Oh, that's so cute.

Archie (Host) | 00:08:29 to 00:08:49
Yeah. I don't understand why people would find an issue with this. And I'm gonna read some of the comments. So do you want to explain what the video is before I keep going? So basically, it's like a little chameleon that's popping out of the shell that is multi coloured and it's got all these other chameleons around it while it's sitting on there.

Katie (Host) | 00:08:49 to 00:09:03
And it's basically saying, we all grow up as ourselves and we don't pick which part of ourselves. And you basically have to be truly authentic and we should protect that. Yeah. Is the summary I would give. And it's really beautiful and positive and actually doesn't say anything about the queer community.

Katie (Host) | 00:09:03 to 00:09:22
Apart from the fact, I think, in. The comments, this is happy pride month or something like that. So first comment that caught my eye was, these comments are why we need pride month. And from some of the hateful comments on this one, under this one was your why your generation is a failed one. Let's unpack that for a second.

Katie (Host) | 00:09:22 to 00:09:40
That's why your generation is a failed one. It's that whole notion of older generations thinking, you know, the woke generation and that we're ruining every. Like, they're ruining everything and all that kind of stuff. And I think that's where it comes from because the world is so PC. I think that's where that comment has stemmed from, but I can't be sure.

Katie (Host) | 00:09:40 to 00:10:02
But yeah, it's so weird because as if the world was so great previously when everyone was, like, calling each other gay slurs or racial slurs and people. People. And misogynistic and feminist and punching people. To a pulp as a form of bullying and like it. How is that a better world?

Katie (Host) | 00:10:02 to 00:10:08
How is that a better world? I don't get it. But eleven people liked that comment. Oh, well, 120. Like the one about.

Archie (Host) | 00:10:08 to 00:10:18
These are comments. These comments are why we need pride month. But yeah, eleven people actually like that. This was this morning, so it could have changed. Another one said, that's not how Mother Nature works.

Archie (Host) | 00:10:18 to 00:10:30
That's not how reality works. That's what you want to work in your make believe land. What do you mean that's not how nature works? Have they not realised that there are gay animals everywhere? What about the famous gay penguins?

Katie (Host) | 00:10:30 to 00:10:40
What about our dogs? What about seahorses? Yeah, absolutely. What about fish who change their genders? Like, there are so many things.

Katie (Host) | 00:10:40 to 00:10:50
There are so many out there. Animals out there who are queer. Yeah, that's exactly how nature works. We're going against nature. Maybe get with the programme, bruh, bruh, bruh.

Archie (Host) | 00:10:50 to 00:11:01
But there's also several comments about God I'm unfollowing, and I'm unfollowing you now. That kind of thing. And this one made me laugh. Here's one. Stop stealing the rainbow from christians.

Katie (Host) | 00:11:01 to 00:11:13
What do you mean, the rainbow from christians? What, like, when the. Oh, gosh, I'm such a bad christian. Was it meant to be like Noah's ark? And then after the storms, there was a rainbow?

Archie (Host) | 00:11:13 to 00:11:26
I'm not what it is. I'm not sure. But you couldn't actually go onto their comment afterwards, so I think they've been embarrassed and they've deleted it. And also, like, how do christians. Do christians govern the rainbow?

Archie (Host) | 00:11:27 to 00:11:40
I have no idea. But, yeah, there's a lot of comments about it, actually. It's just saying it's so annoying that they stole the rainbow flag and look it on Google. So maybe we need to look into the history of the rainbow. And when did the lgbt community adopt that?

Archie (Host) | 00:11:40 to 00:11:51
I think something to look at, but, yeah, I thought that was a weird comment. And eleven people didn't like that. Disappointed. Dang. We love you guys, but this is disappointing to see you jabbing people's parenting, knowing nothing about it.

Archie (Host) | 00:11:51 to 00:12:02
Kristin Annie Bell thought of you better than this. Probably going to unfollow. What do you mean, jabbing people's parenting? Because it's not jabbing people's parenting, it's supporting. It's just basically.

Katie (Host) | 00:12:02 to 00:12:19
Actually just supporting your children. Right. It's just, hey, you're going to love your children no matter what. And it's. And seeing some of the comments and seeing people, you know, several people who've recently got married or are going to get married and their families aren't, won't be there to support them because they don't believe in it and they can't support their child.

Archie (Host) | 00:12:20 to 00:12:30
And in a world that's 2024, and people keep asking, why do we have pride month? And we probably keep saying this every year. This is why we have pride month. Yeah, totally. This is a good one.

Archie (Host) | 00:12:30 to 00:12:45
Love this. Love to our LGBTQIA friends and family far and wide, mother Nature made you just as wonderful as anyone else and stronger. Yeah, damn straight. Under that, of course, there's always hate. Every beautiful comment there was like, there's hate people just couldn't leave alone.

Archie (Host) | 00:12:45 to 00:12:56
Leave it alone. Sorry. That's interesting because the t in LGBTQ flies directly in the face of mother nature. People are telling children they were born in the wrong body and need medical intervention. That's not nature.

Katie (Host) | 00:12:57 to 00:13:10
Wow. Yeah. I don't even know how to respond to that. I don't think there is an adequate response to that, because, first of all, there is trans in nature. There's intersex in nature.

Archie (Host) | 00:13:10 to 00:13:37
This all comes from the misinformation and the lies and all the campaigns that's been coming directly from America and has gone to the UK and is increasing into Australia. So, remember, she is a huge american artist as an actress. And obviously her fan base is mainly Americans with some people, the rest of the world. So if you think about that and, you know, she does kind of portray the ideal american girl. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:13:37 to 00:13:54
That her and Dax Shepard and that ideal family unit. That's what they kind of think, you know, the. What do you call it? Like the goal family or whatever, that kind of stuff. And so when she posts something that's beautiful as this that actually goes against someone else's beliefs of what they think she is, it kind of gives a bit of a shock, like, oh, you're not like us.

Archie (Host) | 00:13:54 to 00:14:18
Because there's a lot of christians who are commenting, and a lot of people have different faiths who are commenting. I wonder why she did this, why she felt the need to do this. Because you know how after is an armchair expert with Jonathan from queer eye. Oh, that was a terrible episode and. How horrible it was and how it was perceived to be even worse before it was cut.

Archie (Host) | 00:14:19 to 00:14:36
Yeah. I wonder if this is from her manager and her team. This is a publicity kind of thing to kind of band aid over. A lot of that situation was it could. Because a lot of the time, the actresses and actors don't actually control their own Facebook.

Archie (Host) | 00:14:37 to 00:14:47
It's done by a whole media marketing team. So it could be because that. That after that came out, I unfollowed. Yeah. A Dax shepherd podcast.

Archie (Host) | 00:14:48 to 00:15:00
I was like, that's disgusting. And I thought, you're better than that. And. Yeah, but it could be the fact that it wasn't highlighted through the editing as well, how problematic it was. Yes.

Katie (Host) | 00:15:00 to 00:15:17
Like, if you're making someone cry or feel uncomfortable to the level that they're evidently distraught in an interview. Yeah. And you're not looking at yourself. Oh, it makes me feel really uncomfortable and gives me such an icky, disgusting feeling. It could be.

Archie (Host) | 00:15:17 to 00:15:31
We don't know, but it could be a media kind of COVID up. There's a couple more comments before. Got a few. There's a lot on here, but these are the ones that really stuck out to me. Someone else was like, every detransitioner and person who have left a gay lifestyle would disagree with you.

Archie (Host) | 00:15:31 to 00:15:50
So that was in regards to, you know, Mother Nature. Yeah. And obviously it's because of those detransition documentaries and things and that kind of stuff. But then someone did say in support, detransitioners make up a tiny percentage of trans people. And their reasoning for de transitioning are mostly because society still didn't accept them for who they are and made them targets for violence and discrimination.

Katie (Host) | 00:15:50 to 00:16:04
Yeah. I mean, yeah. Like you mentioned, we have talked about this before, that the percentage of people who de transition or regret transitioning I think is like 3%. It was like something that was minuscule. It was.

Archie (Host) | 00:16:04 to 00:16:14
It was ridiculously small. And. Which was less than any other surgery that is performed. Yes. So I like that kind of combats that whole topic of the amount of.

Archie (Host) | 00:16:14 to 00:16:26
People de transitioning, people don't look into why and majority of the time it's not regretting. Yeah. It is because of society and the acceptance of them. And so people forget that fact. I gotta say, being gay is not for the faint hearted.

Archie (Host) | 00:16:26 to 00:16:43
No. And so it's quite funny, you know, when people can wear rainbows and wear pride stuff and not feel threatened. Because even though we have this podcast, sometimes I'm scared to wear our merch. Yeah. Because.

Archie (Host) | 00:16:43 to 00:16:48
Which is ridiculous. Right? It's absolutely ridiculous. For fear of backlash. Do you know what?

Katie (Host) | 00:16:48 to 00:17:18
I agree with you, and I had this discussion with you because we've had Ida Hobbit came and went and we did a lovely topic on that. So I arranged for work and this is the first time I've done it because now I'm working in a smaller team that we were going to celebrate Idaho because we really like celebrating different cultural things from around the world. We like, we just celebrate chinese new year, basically. If there's a chance to celebrate my work, let's celebrate. Because we were all about inclusivity.

Katie (Host) | 00:17:18 to 00:17:50
And it's fucking great. Amazing. And so I organised, and my boss helped me organise our celebration for Ida Hobbit. And I've got to say, and I discussed this with you a couple of days coming up to it, and even on the day is how nervous I was about celebrating this and what kind of backlash. Backlash or what kind of reactions I would get from both my patients because I work with a lot older patients, that most of them are geriatrics as well as the different stuff.

Katie (Host) | 00:17:50 to 00:18:12
Because the amount of homophobia I've experienced at work is quite significant. In the past, not so much now, but I have the great thing of actually I pass. So I don't really ever have to have those conversations that work that much. But it made me feel really uncomfortable. And granted, we had a lovely day and it was really awesome and it just.

Katie (Host) | 00:18:12 to 00:18:26
But it is something that sits in the back of your head, like you were saying with our merchandise, is that you constantly are thinking, am I going to get. Am I in danger? Yeah. Am I in danger? Is somebody going to yell at me?

Katie (Host) | 00:18:26 to 00:18:41
Is somebody. Is this going to be a really difficult conversation? Am I going to be disregarded because I am queer and I am part. Of this community and like I've mentioned before, I'm so lucky that I pass. You know, a lot of the younger students don't even realise.

Archie (Host) | 00:18:41 to 00:18:48
And, you know, I don't have to bring it up. And I'm not surprised. You're a hairy motherfucker. You know it. This beard, yo.

Archie (Host) | 00:18:48 to 00:19:02
A couple more and I'm gonna leave the worst one till last. Well, these two. These two are probably the worst out of each of all the comments. So buckle up your seatbelts and maybe sit down because these aren't great. If you're driving, maybe pull over.

Archie (Host) | 00:19:02 to 00:19:10
Jeffrey Dahmer said the exact same thing. All of this is mental health problems that we are turning our back towards. So we don't offend in quotation. Anyone. Help the kids.

Archie (Host) | 00:19:10 to 00:19:16
Don't just agree with them. Jeffrey Dahmer? Yeah. Jeffrey Dahmer, as in the murderer? Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:19:16 to 00:19:28
This is the worst comment I saw. But six people also liked this comment. Okay, imagine you swapped out homosexuality for paedophilia. Still. Okay, well, obviously not because it's paedophilia, right?

Archie (Host) | 00:19:28 to 00:19:41
But on something that. That's pride. It's that whole notion of people saying that paedophiles should be with the LGBTQ Ika community, I don't know where that's come from. But the fact that it's like, what do you want about. What do you mean?

Katie (Host) | 00:19:41 to 00:19:54
Paedophiles? Why would you put even. Why? It just doesn't make any sense. It's honestly like saying if somebody likes having sex with people who are hairy, it's like they like bestiality.

Katie (Host) | 00:19:54 to 00:20:05
Yeah, but not even. But not even because it's even worse than that. And so then someone underneath commented, why would anyone be okay with that? And they responded. They say they were born that way and that is their sexual preference.

Archie (Host) | 00:20:05 to 00:20:17
Where do we draw the line of what is appropriate and what is not? To what standard are we holding? What is right or wrong? Well, I mean, evidently he doesn't know what's appropriate and what's not. Evidently, this person doesn't know what.

Archie (Host) | 00:20:17 to 00:20:36
She's also a life coach. So, yeah. And, you know, so waking up first thing this morning and it is Pride month, and I'm trying to organise doing some pride events with some of the students at school and it's just, wow, you know, and I'm an adult and I can take this on the chin. Yeah. Imagine being a kid.

Katie (Host) | 00:20:36 to 00:20:47
Yeah. Imagine waking up and seeing literally hundreds and hundreds of comments about you being less than a. Yeah. You know, and saying, people the same as a paedophile. Right.

Archie (Host) | 00:20:47 to 00:21:01
This is why we do Pride month and, you know, this is why we have events and people promoting and whatnot. Because sometimes it's the only time that some of us feel safe. Well, that's the whole thing, is we just want to feel safe to live our lives. That's the only thing. That's what we're fighting for.

Archie (Host) | 00:21:02 to 00:21:17
Not hard cheque on some of your queer mates this month and just make sure they're okay. And if you do have a young child or a young person in your family, maybe just cheque in and see if they're okay and maybe get them off social media. I know that there was. I think it's in either. Is it Australia?

Archie (Host) | 00:21:17 to 00:21:26
There's a country that I was looking at recently that are going to make social media. You must be 16 and over. Oh, really? Yep. How would they.

Katie (Host) | 00:21:27 to 00:21:37
What's the word? Not guidance? I don't know. Because Facebook was supposed to be 16 and over, and then it used to be 16 and over and everybody used to just put a fake birth date in. It's exactly like Japan, right?

Archie (Host) | 00:21:37 to 00:21:46
When you go to Japan and you're buying alcohol and it says, are you over 21? And you just click the button and then you can buy your alcohol. Yeah, that's so true. Yeah. So why.

Katie (Host) | 00:21:46 to 00:21:58
How they couldn't. I don't know, but what they used to do on Facebook is if you did know a kid was under the age of 16, you could report it. Oh, really? So it might be, you know, if someone finds it, or, like, a relative finds it, then they'll report it. I'm not sure if that's.

Katie (Host) | 00:21:58 to 00:22:16
It would be so hard to actually govern that, though, because if you think about it, they'd be like, oh, they look. Cause do you know how some 16 year olds these days look like they're 21? Maybe a family member or a friend, like an older someone who would find it or. And how would they do it? Show us your driver's licence.

Katie (Host) | 00:22:16 to 00:22:24
Send us a picture of your driver's licence. Proof of age. Imagine the amount of fraud that would end up happening. We just watched the Ashley Madison documentary. Oh, that was so interesting.

Katie (Host) | 00:22:24 to 00:22:37
And it was so interesting. Have a watch of that. I didn't realise it was still going today. We both didn't realise that it was a dating website for adultery. We just thought it was like one of those random late night things that used to be on it, like, what is it after twelve?

Archie (Host) | 00:22:37 to 00:22:53
And when you had three channels in the country hotels, and then it was just like the same things rotated over and over and over. Yeah, I literally just thought it was like hot singles in your area, that kind of thing. Yeah, but no talking about hot singles in your area. Me? No, I'm not single.

Archie (Host) | 00:22:53 to 00:23:11
So I remember this one time I was staying up late and I was at my Auntie Kathy's house and we were watching, everybody was asleep and I was awake and then I had to wake up everybody because, you know, the hot singles in the area, that was someone we used to do karate with. Don't eat it. We were like, oh, my God, that's thick. And I was like, wake them up. Like it is too.

Katie (Host) | 00:23:11 to 00:23:24
How do you even get on that? You would have to be paid to do a modelling agency, I think. I know she moved to Perth for modelling, so it's probably something to do with that. But isn't it, when it says hot singles in your area, isn't it just like a phone line? Yeah, but she'd just been actress.

Archie (Host) | 00:23:25 to 00:23:36
Yeah, it'd just be an actress. Like, hey, we want to pay you for this ad. Yes, it's so interesting. But, you know, 02:00 in the morning, I was like, hey, I know that person. Anyway, so shall we get onto the queer day?

Katie (Host) | 00:23:38 to 00:23:42
Queer. Ta da. All right, queer. And a, everyone, do you have any queer? A.

Katie (Host) | 00:23:43 to 00:23:52
I was looking through and I have not found anything that's appropriate for. I've got some, I've got some. It's always me. It's fine. Yeah, I do all the hard work around here.

Katie (Host) | 00:23:53 to 00:24:08
Yeah. I mean, you're not wrong, you're not wrong. But secondly, whenever I ask you questions, you're just like, oh, this is difficult. I don't want to answer these questions. Number one, if you have a dead name and a good relationship with your parents, do you ever worry about them being hurt over the rejection of the name they chose for you?

Archie (Host) | 00:24:08 to 00:24:20
Would you be worried? Would I be worried? Yeah. If I was trans or if I was wanting to identify as something that's not my chosen name. I think it all depends about your relationship with your parents.

Archie (Host) | 00:24:20 to 00:24:44
Yeah. And if you are, I mean, if you're current name or your name assigned at birth is something that's causing you dysphoria and you're needing to change it. If you've got parents who are supportive of you, they are always going to support you. If you've got parents who aren't supportive of you, they're always going to be unsupportive of you. I think that you can't change other people's reactions.

Katie (Host) | 00:24:44 to 00:25:02
You can only change yourself. And if it's something that's going to cause you more trauma by going by the same name that you were assigned as birth, then why does. Why does other people's opinions matter? It shouldn't. And the thing is, as well, if you're thinking about it, I knew someone, I think by the time I was 16, they just changed their name four times.

Archie (Host) | 00:25:02 to 00:25:15
They just did. See, I always think about that because I'm like, you know, when you're a kid, you're just like, I want to change my name to blah, blah. So some people are just very, very indecisive. My dead name, I spoke to my mum about it because mum was the one who named us. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:25:15 to 00:25:29
And I said, hey, this is what I would like my, you know, my name to be now. And what would you like my middle name to be? Would you like it to be the name that you gave me or the name that you were gonna give me if I was a boy or if I was born a boy? Yeah. So that's why.

Katie (Host) | 00:25:29 to 00:25:40
What was she gonna call you? They're all biblical names. Of course it was. Your mom has such weird choices of names. I wanna say one was Dorian and one was Jacob or something like that.

Archie (Host) | 00:25:40 to 00:25:48
Something like that. Dorian is in, like, the frame and he never ages. He has a photo, like a. Oh. I have no idea.

Katie (Host) | 00:25:48 to 00:25:56
I just thought Dorian Grey. Oh, gosh, you're not in the right. No, no, no. No idea. But I was just thinking, like, if had I been Dorian, I could have been called Dory.

Archie (Host) | 00:25:56 to 00:26:00
It would have been great. Dory? Yeah. Oh, it's hit you with ADHD. You know it?

Archie (Host) | 00:26:01 to 00:26:05
Yeah. So that's Jacob. Yeah. I think you'd be more of a Jacob, though. You reckon?

Katie (Host) | 00:26:05 to 00:26:10
Yeah. You're definitely not Moradorian. No. How did you choose Archer? I thought I told you this.

Katie (Host) | 00:26:11 to 00:26:19
You may have, but we also remember how bad my memory is. Um, so I was. I remember I used to do. So I used to do karate as a kid. And there was these comics and they're always Archer comics there.

Archie (Host) | 00:26:19 to 00:26:39
And I used to read the Archer comics, and I was like, hey, oh, I really like this Archie fellow and this kind of idea. And then I was like, you know, then I started thinking about, oh, I wanted to be a boy and that kind of stuff. And so I named myself Archer on legal stuff because it sounds more official, and then. But everybody calls me Archie. Yeah, it's funny because Archie in the comics is actually really annoying.

Katie (Host) | 00:26:39 to 00:26:48
He's a very annoying. But as, like, a seven year old, I was like, this Archie guy is cool. He's got all the girls wanting him. You know, you just wanted Betty and Veronica. You know it.

Archie (Host) | 00:26:48 to 00:26:57
I just wanted Betty and Veronica. Oh, my God. I just wanted to be able to make Betty and Veronica both want me at the same time. Anyway, that explains so much. What to do.

Archie (Host) | 00:26:58 to 00:27:08
If I'm constantly being misgendered and dead named, especially dead named by people who I am close with, what to do? What do I do? Oh, that's a good question. So it kind of relates back to the other one. What would you do?

Katie (Host) | 00:27:09 to 00:27:42
Well, I mean, I would probably try and ascertain why. Because, like, if they're doing it out of disrespect, because sometimes, okay, sometimes people do it. Because it might just be that you've only recently started identifying as a different name or identifying as a different gender, and it's hard making the adaption at times. If you're so used to identifying people as one thing and then trying to make the difference between how they want to identify, now, that's understandable. But it's all about situational awareness.

Katie (Host) | 00:27:42 to 00:28:11
If you've been identified as one name for the last ten years and they've never known you as that other name, and all of a sudden they're calling you your dead name and gendering you by a gender that you don't identify as, then I'd be like, well, I'd first of all have a discussion with them and be like, well, let's have a chat about this. You seem to be calling me by this other name. I find it really disrespectful because I've told you what I want to identify as. Cause it is disrespectful. Yeah.

Katie (Host) | 00:28:11 to 00:28:29
It's like calling somebody an idiot when it's worse. It's almost like a racial slur in a way, because it's derogatory if it's meant with malice. Yes. And that's the thing I think it comes from. What's the intent of this person who is misgendering and deadnaming someone.

Katie (Host) | 00:28:29 to 00:28:41
Yeah. What would you do? So if it was someone close to me and I told them time and time again, and they're doing it from malicious, I just cut them out. I would literally give them, okay, you either call me this name or you don't call me at all. Yeah.

Archie (Host) | 00:28:41 to 00:29:06
When my family were getting used to it, they did misgender me and they did dead name me all the time, but they corrected themselves because they knew that it was, and they said, I'm sorry, you know, it's going to take some time to get used to because I did call you this name for 30 years, and I was like, totally get it. That's great. You know, and they were very open about it. But if it's someone who is literally doing it just because they're like, no, I like this name, and this is who I know you as you're done, you're out of my life. I don't have time for that negativity or anything like that.

Archie (Host) | 00:29:06 to 00:29:16
The top comment, once they know and still don't make an effort, maybe consider who you're close with. You deserve love and respect. And I agree 100% with that one. Definitely. This is a good one.

Archie (Host) | 00:29:16 to 00:29:28
How do I get rid of the feeling not queer enough as a pansexual in a hetero relationship? Oh, well, you're talking to the right lad. Ladder. You're talking to the. Talking to the right ladder.

Archie (Host) | 00:29:28 to 00:29:34
You're scottish all of a sudden. I. I used to love doing scottish accents as a kid. Can you actually still do them? No.

Archie (Host) | 00:29:34 to 00:29:44
Did you not hear that terrible rendition also in a low voice, like, you know, like, I was doing Mickey Mouse the other day. I used to do really good Mickey Mouse, and I can't do them anymore. No. Cause your voice is so much lower now. No.

Katie (Host) | 00:29:44 to 00:29:50
I'm so glad you. It's actually kind of creepy. I don't like it anyway. Sorry. Keep going.

Katie (Host) | 00:29:51 to 00:30:02
It's difficult. I feel this all the time. It's sometimes a struggle. It really is. Only you can know how queer you feel, and nobody else can really judge you for it.

Katie (Host) | 00:30:03 to 00:30:24
I've struggled with this a lot in my life because I've had relationships that have long relationships that have been with men as well as women, and then with trans men. Trans man, you, my love. Sorry. But often when we're in queer places because you pass and I'm feminine, sometimes I think that we just look like a heterosexual couple. Yeah.

Katie (Host) | 00:30:25 to 00:30:46
And at times I find myself putting on a facade of being more queer to feel like I fit into spaces. Queer spaces, which is ridiculous. Because no one can tell you you don't fit into a queer space. If you're queer, it doesn't matter. It's.

Katie (Host) | 00:30:46 to 00:30:58
I actually saw something on Reddit the other day that was just like. It was a really interesting thing. It was. I'm gender fluid and I've always been attracted to women. Does that mean I'm straight or does that mean I'm a lesbian?

Katie (Host) | 00:30:59 to 00:31:13
Or does that mean I'm both? Huh? And I was like, well, that's fair, because you're attracted to women. I think that there's probably a term out there for it. I'm sure there would be, being attracted to women, but that's going to be so different from day to day, depending on how they identify.

Katie (Host) | 00:31:13 to 00:31:35
Because if they identify as she, he, they, then it's changing depending on where they are in their life and what they feel like is sitting with them at that point in time. So it's hard. Gender is a spectrum, as we always say. Gender is a huge spectrum. And, like, the only person who can tell you you fit is you.

Katie (Host) | 00:31:35 to 00:31:52
There's something you've really got to work on yourself and feeling confident and empowering yourself, because nobody, like nobody else, can give you this. You have to take it for yourself. And sometimes you just need to stand in front of a mirror and be. Like, I want to be here, and I'll add my two cent. I think there is no such thing as not queer enough.

Archie (Host) | 00:31:52 to 00:32:14
Yeah, I think that you are you and you are beautiful and everybody belongs in a queer space. Top comment was 39 and feel this still. But joining activities like a rec sports team, a social club, an art class, etcetera, with other people in the queer community can make you feel more part of it. I did those things and they certainly helped. I've removed a lot from my schedule and routine because my priorities have changed.

Archie (Host) | 00:32:14 to 00:32:35
But I'm glad I made those connections and know it's possible to feel like I'm part of the community. In brackets, I'm bi and married to a het cis man. Hang in there. That's such a good point, is that being part of the community will make you feel more part of the community. Like any group, to be honest, is you have to be active to feel like you're part of it.

Archie (Host) | 00:32:35 to 00:32:44
Yeah. In the same way as if you were in a volleyball team, but you didn't turn up to any of the volleyball teams. Are you really in the team? Yes, you are. But you still pay the registration, so yes, you are.

Archie (Host) | 00:32:44 to 00:32:54
You just don't go to the game. Yeah. So maybe if you're feeling that way, get out to a queer event. There's nothing quite like being around other queer people to make you feel more queer. And I think there's a crystal and stone.

Archie (Host) | 00:32:54 to 00:33:03
Yeah, I was most. I think there's the crystal and stone market that we're probably going to go ahead and head down and have a look at. Yeah, damn straight. That's queers Lovecraft. And there was.

Archie (Host) | 00:33:03 to 00:33:10
I'm not sure if I think it's finished now. There was the perfectly queer as part of south Perth. Oh, there was. We're meant to go to that, but. It'S only for youth.

Archie (Host) | 00:33:11 to 00:33:21
Yeah, I'm not sure we're out of the age bracket. Are you sure? Yeah, yeah, I've got enough wrinkles now. Here's another one. Can I be asexual and bi?

Katie (Host) | 00:33:21 to 00:33:26
Yes. Deadpan answer. Would you like to explain that? Can you explain your answer? Why yes?

Katie (Host) | 00:33:26 to 00:33:30
Why? Yes. Let me show you my. Working on my piece of paper. Yep.

Katie (Host) | 00:33:30 to 00:33:43
Asexuality means depending on what part of asexual I feel like I've said this so much. Depending on the spectrum. Depending on the spectrum. How many times has Katie said spectrum in this episode? Actually, probably only four times.

Katie (Host) | 00:33:43 to 00:33:49
Hey, I'm doing better with my repetitive words, guys. I'm not. I've said like 100%, like ten times already. Oh, have you? Yeah, I think so.

Archie (Host) | 00:33:49 to 00:33:58
Ah, yeah, keep going. Okay. I think that it, when it comes down to it, what was the question? I forgot. Can you be asexual or bisexual?

Katie (Host) | 00:33:58 to 00:34:04
Yes, you can be asexual. Yes, you can be asexual. Remember what asexual defines you as. Let's go back to play school. What is asexual?

Katie (Host) | 00:34:04 to 00:34:22
Asexual is somebody who doesn't feel sexual attraction towards people. There is a huge umbrella term, like a lot of other things within queer spaces. It can mean that you're either aromantic that you don't feel sexual intentions towards other people. Sometimes you only feel romantic intentions. Sometimes you can feel romantic intentions.

Katie (Host) | 00:34:22 to 00:34:31
Sometimes you can feel sexual intentions. It's a spectrum. I saw you pause before you said spectrum, but you're like, I've got no other word. I did. I looked you deadpan in the eyes at this stage.

Katie (Host) | 00:34:31 to 00:34:53
So that's what that means. Yep. Bisexual is when you're attracted to assigned female, assigned male at birth. Yes, that's what being bisexual is. So if you are asexual but you still have romantic intentions to people, but you find both those two genders attractive, both dranders, gendarr yeah.

Katie (Host) | 00:34:53 to 00:34:57
Attractive. I'm not going to correct that. Good luck with editing. I'm going to leave it in. Everybody's going to hear that.

Katie (Host) | 00:34:57 to 00:35:06
Fabulous. Just hearing the authentic side of me, guys. So you could be asexual and bisexual at the same time. I wish we were recording this. I'm like, poking eyes into the sky.

Archie (Host) | 00:35:06 to 00:35:17
She's like, viciously poking her. Like, you know how you do, like, the peace sign or bunny ears, like, she's literally, like, viciously, like. Like vipering at the air right now. No, we'll get back to videos. But I.

Archie (Host) | 00:35:17 to 00:35:26
There's just so much work and I haven't done it. No, honestly. Yeah. I would prefer to sit here in my trackie Dax and you guys not see me. Yeah, we don't actually have to put in effort when we.

Katie (Host) | 00:35:26 to 00:35:35
No. Do you know how much makeup I put on for you guys? You have no idea. I try and zhuzh myself up even though it doesn't look like it because I'm not a Zhuzh lady. Yeah, I do it for you guys.

Katie (Host) | 00:35:35 to 00:35:44
Cause I love you. The top comment was yes. See, I told you. That's what I said. All right, last question before we finish.

Katie (Host) | 00:35:44 to 00:35:54
Yes. Are we all obsessed with either sharks or dinosaurs or both? As the queer community, are we all obsessed with either sharks or dinosaurs or both? What would you choose if you. Dinosaurs?

Katie (Host) | 00:35:54 to 00:36:09
Yeah, I mean, I literally just spent. The weekend making little polymer dinosaurs. I fucking love dinosaurs. When did your love from dinosaurs start? I was a kid, I used to literally, you know, those, those really old dinosaurs, like the really hard, hard ones, and you could put your finger in it and you could like, walk around.

Archie (Host) | 00:36:09 to 00:36:23
Yeah, I still love them. I was obsessed with them and I was obsessed with the land before time. Like land before time. I think we had a VHS and I literally played that vhs to death. Yeah, I love land before time, and that's when I became obsessed with dinosaurs.

Archie (Host) | 00:36:23 to 00:36:35
And I think the first time when I came to Perth and I saw the museum and I saw dinosaur bones, I was like, it's a dinosaur. I love dinosaurs. Always have. You don't have any dinosaur tattoos? No, because I don't know which one I wanted.

Archie (Host) | 00:36:36 to 00:36:44
I don't know yet. I was going to get one, like a little, little one, but I don't know. What would you. If you had a top three of, what would you get? What would you get?

Archie (Host) | 00:36:44 to 00:36:53
I would get stegosaurus. Yeah. A t rex. Yeah. And, uh, would you do the stereotypical diplodocus with a lot?

Archie (Host) | 00:36:53 to 00:36:59
No. Or the one the. Is it a brachiosaurus. The one that had the spiky bits. I would do the brachiosaurus.

Katie (Host) | 00:36:59 to 00:37:06
Spiky tail. Yeah, yeah. They're pretty cool, aren't they? Those would be the three that I do. When I was a kid, I used to know so much about dinosaurs and be obsessed with them.

Archie (Host) | 00:37:06 to 00:37:16
I just love dinosaurs, and I really love cartoony dinosaurs as well. That's really cute. I used to have, like, yeah, so I used to have, like, the dinosaur books and. Yeah. Land before time stuff.

Archie (Host) | 00:37:16 to 00:37:26
And I used to have dinosaur stickers and all that thing. I think. Yes, we are all, but I think we're more obsessed with dinosaurs, I think as a queer community. What are you obsessed with? Sharks?

Archie (Host) | 00:37:26 to 00:37:30
I don't know. What do you mean? I've never seen somebody obsessed with a shark. Maybe it's because we live. Oh, okay.

Katie (Host) | 00:37:30 to 00:37:55
I would love to know if this question is based in Australia or in America, because I feel like a lot of queer people are obsessed with sea creatures in general. Have you noticed that a lot of the whale tattoos and a lot of wave based tattoos, I see that a lot in the queer community. But is that not just what was popular at the time as society wise? Cause I've seen a lot of whale tattoos, dugongs. Maybe there's just a lot of gay people out there.

Archie (Host) | 00:37:55 to 00:38:04
Maybe I was just like that. The international symbol of gay. Get a dug on you. Oh, my gosh. You should make an ad.

Katie (Host) | 00:38:04 to 00:38:14
Get a jug on in you. On you, not in you. People said, yes. Ace here with an interest in dinosaurs, frogs, and planets. I would agree with planets as well.

Archie (Host) | 00:38:14 to 00:38:29
Dinosaurs and planets. I think if you were only to choose two and that we had the three choices of sharks, dinosaurs, and planets, I would go, dinosaurs and planets. Yeah, I agree with you because there's that stereotypical thing that queer women, lesbians are obsessed with. Astrology. Astrology.

Archie (Host) | 00:38:29 to 00:38:36
And with the. And the what's it? Not the what's the thing with the Pisces and the. No. Oh, it's astrology.

Katie (Host) | 00:38:36 to 00:38:44
Yeah. I was just waiting for your brain to compute that. Oh, you're funny. Star signs. That's the word I was looking for.

Archie (Host) | 00:38:45 to 00:38:49
Obsessed with the star signs. That's so funny. I've worked all day. All right. I know.

Archie (Host) | 00:38:49 to 00:39:01
A long day. Not really all day, but I did work today. Yeah, I would agree with you. I would agree with you. If I had to sub out dinosaurs, I would probably say, oh, this is hard.

Archie (Host) | 00:39:01 to 00:39:06
Halloween. Oh, yes. Nice. That is very good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Katie (Host) | 00:39:06 to 00:39:10
Oh, you're smart. I'm so smart. You're full of it. Full of it. No, you're smart.

Katie (Host) | 00:39:11 to 00:39:15
You're full of smart. You're so kind. Yeah. So that's. That's been our episode today.

Archie (Host) | 00:39:15 to 00:39:22
Hope you do like our queernas. Yeah. Thanks for listening along to our queer. And a. Yeah, it's just a bunch of rambling stuff.

Katie (Host) | 00:39:22 to 00:39:41
I know. Sometimes if you just need to put us on to have somebody to chat to or listen along in the car, just shove a QR and a on, because that's what it's gonna be. Yeah. Every now and then, in between our interviews, our hardcore ones, towards the end. Of last year, we're having a lot of hardcore intense ones and so we thought we needed a bit of a palate cleanser.

Archie (Host) | 00:39:41 to 00:39:46
Let us know. Do you like the queernaes? Do you not like the queernaes? Do you want more queernas? Do you want less queernase?

Katie (Host) | 00:39:46 to 00:39:54
Only say more queernaise. We're not doing less and we're not cutting them out. Don't even try. I need this for my mental health. We both need it for our mentor.

Archie (Host) | 00:39:54 to 00:40:03
We do, we do. And it's just an easy one to do where we don't have to sit through hours and hours of research to get done as well. Yeah, exactly. Because we do love you and we do love doing this. Yeah.

Katie (Host) | 00:40:03 to 00:40:11
Yeah. Anyway, thank you for listening. It's been freaking fabulous. I hope everyone's having a great pride month. Yeah, get out there, do some more community events.

Katie (Host) | 00:40:11 to 00:40:21
Get into the community, you allies, you querens. Get into the queer community. Get yourself in some queerness. Celebrate with a rainbow frag. I'm gonna cut all that out.

Katie (Host) | 00:40:21 to 00:40:29
Don't cut any of it out. Perfect. I love this is me. Anyway, love you all. How about we do a proper.

Archie (Host) | 00:40:29 to 00:40:39
That was terrible. No, I thought it was beautiful. People love us for our authenticity. Don't they want to feel like they're sitting in the room with us jabbering? It was more like, I didn't want the bit that says, get the queer in you.

Katie (Host) | 00:40:39 to 00:40:45
Get the queer in. Like, get the dugongs in you. Yeah, exactly. I really like dugongs. I do like Dugong.

Katie (Host) | 00:40:45 to 00:41:00
Do you know what? I think dugongs are like the rhinoceroses of the ocean. But if rhinoceroses only ate weed, I. Do think, yeah, dugongs are probably the rhinoceros of the sea. Yeah, I guess you were right.

Archie (Host) | 00:41:00 to 00:41:17
I hope you have enjoyed this episode. If you have enjoyed this episode, please share like and subscribe on your favourite podcast listening platform. We'll be back in your ear holes in two weeks. Yeah, we totally will be. So, until next time, I hope that we have been perfectly queer.